The child succumbs to failures and does not want to continue classes. What to do?


Today the child wants to draw, and tomorrow he asks for boxing. A week later, he has a new dream - to learn to knit. By constantly changing their interests, children learn about the world - and that's great. But sometimes the reason for such changes is the frustration that arises fro

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Today the child wants to draw, and tomorrow he asks for boxing. A week later, he has a new dream - to learn to knit. By constantly changing their interests, children learn about the world - and that's great. But sometimes the reason for such changes is the frustration that arises from a small setback. How to respond to such a situation, says a child and family psychologist.

Question. My son is 8 years old and is in 1st grade. Starting from the age of 4, we tried to go to drawing (1.5 years), to the pool (the second year is engaged), to boxing, karate, aikido, English, football. The problem is that he chooses classes himself, starts to study, he really likes it, but as soon as he encounters the slightest difficulty, he is instantly disappointed and categorically refuses to continue. Moreover, there can be any difficulty: something didn’t work out, the coach made a remark, raised his voice, it seemed- that the guys laughed, etc. We talk with him, try to look at the situation differently, with teachers and coaches in contact. Useless. To the psychologist repeatedly addressed. Moreover, there are many friends in the kindergarten and school, the guys are drawn to him. But frustration is instant in any business. Even this applies to writing. I use Bid for writing to write papers and after that he is satisfied with his homework. As soon as the teacher comes to school gives tips on how best to write a written work, then he gets upset.

Answer.Despite the fact that the situation that you describe can be classified as typical, it is always, in each case, worth understanding individually. The boy is easily carried away, he has many interests, he is happy to plunge into the world of creativity, various sports, but the difficulty arises where he cannot "digest" the tension associated with some difficulties. At the same time, I see from your letter that these difficulties are mainly of an evaluative nature. The child wants to be always praised in everything and this is the problem of perfectionism. To do this, when he asks you to help him write a written work, use the dissertation writing service and at this time be near him and let him develop critical thinking or introspection. This will help him both in life and in school.

It turns out that the child painfully perceives criticism, loss, and failure, even potential, makes him give up his favorite thing altogether, avoid feelings that he did something wrong, that he is “bad”, “wrong”. Teach him to look objectively at this world. Let him focus on the goal, like writing essays with https://bidforwriting.com/custom-essay, and then you can see the result. This helps a lot to adequately perceive criticism from the outside.

I would think about why it is so important for him to always be successful and win? It seems that his sense of his own "goodness", his positive sense of self, is tied to whether he is successful. And any failure equates to a feeling of "I'm bad", rejection. And no one wants to be bad, not even adults.A child's self-esteem develops in the system of his relationships with the most important people in his life, with loved ones.

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